With all the fuss, celebrations and sheer marketing that goes on around a wedding, it’s easy to forget that the main event isn’t the big day itself – it’s the marriage that comes after. Knowing that you are ready to get married is not about whether it’s the right time to slip on a white dress, walk down the aisle and start planning your honeymoon in paradise.
It’s about understanding your reasons for making this most momentous of commitments. So, how do you really know if you’re getting married for the right reasons? Ruling out the wrong ones is a good place to start…
You Began With A Shopping List
It’s true that a wedding involves a fair amount of transactions, but if your first reaction when you think about the wedding is to book an appointment at the nearest bridal gown boutique or start browsing engagement rings from Tacori, it should give you pause for thought.
Of course, it’s perfectly natural to be excited about the trimmings for your big day, but if that is the most exciting thing about it, it’s not a great sign.
You’re Upset About The Ring
When someone loves you enough to propose spending the rest of their life with you, the ring is the symbol, not the endgame. We live in a somewhat toxic social media culture, full of celebrities showing off rocks worth millions, but if you feel that your ring isn’t big or flashy enough, then those sentiments are usually coming from a place where you aren’t appreciating the love behind the gesture.
It’s one thing if it isn’t quite to your taste, but if your concern is more material than that and you’re just worrying about how it will look in your ring selfie for Instagram then you may not have your priorities right.
You’re Becoming A Bridezilla
Handling the stress of organising a wedding can get to the best of us at time, and every bride-to-be could be permitted the occasional meltdown. But if you are making the day all about you at the expense of even your groom’s wishes then you’ve missed the point. She may be the focal point of a lot of it, but a wedding isn’t just about the bride. It’s a celebration of two people coming together, building a life and learning to share and compromise – and that starts with the table decorations and choice of cake fillings! It isn’t respectful to your partner if want to take over the whole day, and gives yet another signal that you’re more focused on the big day than what comes afterwards.
All Your Friends Are Doing It
Weddings can be somewhat like dominoes – one friend gets engaged, then another, and before you know it your whole social life seems to consist of engagement parties and wedding showers. While it is exciting from the outside, what you aren’t present for is the reality of that marriage and commitment after the celebrations stop.
Never be tempted to jump on the bandwagon when it comes to such a serious move. Doing what is right for you and your other half should run on your own timescale and no one else’s.